The Role of Yoga and Movement in Navigating Grief
By Lindsay Silver
This time of year with the many splendors and celebration can be both wonderful and exciting. It can also be a difficult, overwhelming, and lonely time for many. And because we are the complex, intricate, and wonderful beings we are, it can be all of the above.
Read on for reflections on how yoga and movement can support the journey through grief.
Her story.
Just as today, I was living an active lifestyle when my husband died. As can be imagined it was a hard and confusing time of trying to hold it all together after the tide washed away my sandcastle.
My brain knew that movement was and had always been my medicine, but I conscious avoided any physical activity for fear it would unlock uncontrollable emotional release. I literally feared losing control of my emotions once the sweat started dripping and my heart-rate climbed.
I had it all held tight, bound inside.
I didn’t want to cry at the gym or get lost in a workout as I had loved to before. I couldn’t imagine surrendering myself in that way.
A close friend at the time, a fellow mom and dedicated gym buddy, stopped by my house and told me simply, “you need to get back into the gym”. She was the only person to say this to me so straightforwardly; caring, encouraging, and without reservation. Her insights were valuable to me given her own journey with death and loss.
The return.
I returned and on several occasions did need to cry in the bathroom. On some days I was emotional as I literally (and metaphorically) moved weight. On some days the drumbeats and lyrics of my music stirred relentless persistence, and on others it underscored my razor thin breakability.
In hindsight, I am certain that my gym community and regular movement provided a cascade effect towards healing.
His story.
I am in a relationship now with a widower who quite literally endeavored to outrun his feelings of loss and overwhelm while adapting to his new existence. Mile after mile seeking the solitude, to turn down the internal and external noise in the world, and focus on only the next breath.
All this is to say that while grief is a highly individualized journey, it’s also arguably the most universal.
Grief is often described as the wildest expression of love. If you love in this lifetime, you are sure to grieve, but you don’t have to go it alone.
In what ways can yoga help?
Yoga is not a cure, nor will it help you “get over” your loss. To anyone experienced, this notion is laughable in any regard.
A regular yoga practice can provide a space for presence, support, and community as you move through the experience intact.
Yoga can help ease symptoms associated with grief. Symptoms run the gamut and can be emotional, physical, behavioral, and cognitive. Anxiety, loneliness, fatigue, disrupted sleep, restlessness, difficulty concentrating, withdrawal, irritability, and more can all be associated with the grieving process.
The moving meditative quality of a yoga practice can provide body awareness for emotions to rise and falls as they naturally will. Just as each exhale is followed by an inhale so too do our emotions flow along a wave like spectrum and a regular yoga practice provides designated time to truly feel.
A short list
- Child’s pose can help ease anxiety and improve sleep.
- Reclining bound angle resting one hand on your belly and the other on your heart for emotional support.
- The restorative supported bridge pose for gentle well-being.
- Yin Yoga may help release stored tightness in the body and reduce aches and pains.
- Pranayama and breath-work an assist with mental clarity and focus.
Bessel Van der Kolk said “Yoga is not about talking about your trauma. It’s about you and your relationship to your own body.”
Moving your body moves your energy and moves your thoughts allowing for healing to occur in the places you are bound. Release to experience and feel right here and now and the experience of today.
Be it a slow, gentle flow or be it movement and sweat. Attune yourself to your body and the season. Surrender to the fleeting feelings be they heavy or light. Nurture. Remember. Renew.
Whether you stop by the studio for a class, upcoming event, or a chat, let me be that friend now and encourage you in. For the practice or to sit supported in the warmth of the studio with community— you are welcome here.
